In a matter of 6 months, everything fell apart for Barb Roose. if you are in a situation where you have a failing marriage, facing an addiction issue, a job loss, or a health crisis, this episode will you remind you that you are seen and loved. Barb walks us through how she grappled with her loss of control and the fear that grew in her own life when she walked through the hardest year of her life. Learn what God taught her and how you can apply it to your own life today.
Listen to “#145 – Overcoming Fear & Embracing Hope with Barb Roose” on Spreaker.
Show Links:
- Follow Barb Roose Online, Facebook, Insta, Twitter
- Get your copy of Barb’s new book “Surrendered“
- Lysa TerKeurst episode #57
The Modern Motherhood Podcast #57: Lysa TerKeurst – When Life Doesn’t Go As Planned
Transcription:
Julie Lyles Carr: [00:00:00] You’re listening to the allmomdoes podcast from allmomdoes. And part of the Christian Parenting Podcast network family. I’m Julie Lyles Carr, your host. I am a mom of eight, a bestselling author. I have a married to my husband, Michael, for quite a while now. And I am so glad that you are here. The allmomdoes podcast is just for you.
It is to speak directly into your life where you are raising those kids. You know, trying to foster that great romantic relationship, building up that career and the faith journey you’re on. This is a place where you’re going to find inspiration, information, resources, and community here at the allmomdoes Podcast.
Today on the allmomdoes podcast. I get to introduce you to someone who is so meaningful to me has helped me walk through some interesting times. And my own journey is a wealth of wisdom and is absolutely gorgeous. My friend Barbara Roos. Thank you so much for being with me today. Julie, you know, that this makes my day friends I’ve been looking forward to it so much.
So Barbara and I got to know each other because we both have written Bible studies and we got to know each other through our publisher and, you know, friends, sometimes you just get to have that experience where you encounter someone that you just know that you know, that you were destined to be deep friends.
And I don’t know if bar feels that way about me, but that’s how I feel about Barb. So she has to deal with it. So we do not live in the same community. We get to see each other at times, and we’re out speaking at it’s always a great time, but I also really appreciate Barb has become a very trusted friend and just someone who colleague mentors me. Does that make sense? Because we are around the same age or kids around the same age, but she just has a wealth of from life. And so Barb, I’m just so thrilled to be able to share you with my listeners. So why don’t you give my listeners the little, you know, Really quick little run on who you are and where you live and what you do. And all of that.
Barb Roose: [00:02:07] Thank you for just giving me a call saying, let’s do this. And so I love joining you and your audience. Hello everyone. I am a mom, a proud mom of three adult daughters living in Northwest Ohio. And for me, my joy in life is teaching women how to overcome fear. To live a beautifully strong and courageous, and that manifests itself in a variety of ways, whether I’m speaking at conferences, whether I’m writing books or Bible studies or my favorite thing to do.
Is sitting across from someone one on one and just being present with wherever she’s at in life. That is where I believe where God shows does some of the most powerful work in the SOA. And then. I mean, the random stuff that’s really important is that I believe in eating dessert first, same.
Julie Lyles Carr: [00:03:04] See, I knew theologically we were on page. So, you know, that just confirms that and Barb, you are phenomenal onstage and you do have such a gift for being so very present. It’s one of the things that I really want to model well from you, because you really knno, even if we’re just on the phone together, or we’re trying to talk across an Instagram call or whatever you have that ability to really lock in on someone.
My husband Mike is really good at that too on really being able to lock in on someone and listen. Well, when did you realize that you had this as a gift or was this something that you began to develop over time to truly be present for someone in that listening relationship?
Barb Roose: [00:03:45] This is definitely a developmental place in life. There are two pivotal moments in my life. The first was that I spent 14 years on staff at my local church, and I worked for a large mega church. My senior pastor, who was a mentor of mine for almost 20 years. He had a philosophy that people matter to God. That’s what our church was built off of. So he planted some precious seeds inside of all of us as staff about how to really live in a way that showed people that they mattered.
And then many years ago, I think it was back in 2012. I had a really important conversation with Lysa TerKeurst and she’s the president of Proverbs 31. I hosted Lysa co-hosted at a conference. That I used to cohost with a friend and this was before my books, before my Bible studies. And I just said, Lysa, how do you manage the, the women that come to you, does it ever feel overwhelming? How do you handle it? And she said, what I do in that moment, whoever is in front of me, I’m 100% with her while she’s in front of me. And that, that was wisdom that God gave me. That has blessed my life in all of these years. Now that I’m in ministry full time.
Julie Lyles Carr: [00:05:02] I love that, you know, it was, it was Lysa and we’ll we’ll link that episode that we had her on the show and the show knows Lysa was the one who really helped in my first book, because I was really resisting writing about parenthood because I felt like it was just too on the nose. Well, I have eight kids and, and I fight.
Put myself there, would I be pigeonholed there forever? And she gave me great counsel and said, Hey, run with it. You know, her first book was on parenting. She was like, run with it. People are going to be interested in the 8 kid thing, uh, at least as a cautionary tale. Right. And so I really appreciated that.
So beautiful. Yeah. Yeah. Like why, you know, so there it is. I love that, that she was able to speak into your life in such a way, because when you do want to be there for people, it can feel overwhelming knowing the line that is developing, whether that’s on your social media, DMs, or on your texts where people physically with you, but to really take that pause.
That’s really the heart of what I think Jesus did and, and would want us to do when it comes to seeing people. Well, now you were on staff for many years, you did the thing, you were engaged, you were running things, and you got ready to put out the Bible study, which was a dream of yours or something that you would want it to do.
And you would live this life to this point that I think a lot of congregants could have looked at and a lot of your readers could have looked at and thought there she is. I mean, this absolute six foot goddess who is serving Jesus and doing all the things for her church, with the biggest smile you’ve ever seen.
And right about the time all of this was coming to a place of culmination. There was a chasm that opened up beneath your feet that was one that for a lot of people could have left them marooned. What happened?
Barb Roose: [00:06:51] Well, it did not just all fall apart. It fell apart. It caught on fire and then it exploded it literally in the course of a few months, I watched so much unravel. So it was March of 2015 on the day my first book came out. That was, it was the day. And again, I’d been on sandwiches. My church at that point for almost 14 years that day, my senior pastor decided he needed to retire. He had early onset Parkinson’s and so this was my mentor, my pastor. And I was on the executive team of the church and we were in a consultant meeting and it rocked my world because this was someone he just so, so important to me.
And I’ve just kind of made my way through that. Our church began going through a lot of transition. I was one of five on the teaching team and within six weeks, there were only two of us on the teaching team. And then in July, there was a massive family. Um, there was just an event that happened in our family that I just don’t talk about public yet and, um, it threw me and it radically changed our family. A few months later, I realized that I needed to leave my job. And then at the end of the year, we did an intervention for my then husband. And, um, due to an alcohol addiction and he walked away from our family for six months. That was at that point, our second separation due to alcoholism.
And so in a six month period of time, and I ultimately left my job. So everything fell apart and in spectacular ways, you know,
Julie Lyles Carr: [00:08:34] I feel like for you, 2015 in this strange way was emblematic of where a lot of people are finding themselves. In 2020. I have had several friends this year decide to separate and divorce in the middle of the pandemic in the middle of quarantining. I have several friends who’ve realized they have an addiction cycle. They’re going to have to deal with, because it has really gone into flames here during COVID, because it’s been a way of coping, but perhaps it was something that was being used to cope before. And then it just got accelerated through the process of being locked away of the stress of all the things.
And then I have several people who are finding that their jobs are changing dramatically. And so in this really wild way, I feel like that you have been a banner barrier out ahead of us. You’ve time traveled a little bit ahead for some of us, because your dumpster fire a year was not 2020. It was 2015 when everything was looking so good.
How did you reconcile in your own mind? Because let’s face it Barb. A lot of times in ministry, we’re trying to do all the good things, all the right things. I think for a lot of my listeners, they’re trying to raise the kids right. And hit church, like they should and volunteer and do the things when you start seeing things coming apart in a way that doesn’t really make sense for all the good you’re doing.
How did you reconcile some of that in your own heart and mind?
Barb Roose: [00:09:52] Well, I want to first say for anyone out there, who’s listening to our conversation and the things that Julie and I are talking about are resonating with you. The first is that you aren’t alone. That if you are right now in a situation with a feeling marriage, an addiction issue, a job loss, a health crisis that you are seen and loved.
And for me, my early response in 2015, because that was just. That was only the halfway point for us. There was still four more years of really hard things that would happen. But in that space, first, I tried to control, I tried it to fix it. Part of that intervention was me drawing the line, saying enough is enough is enough.
And there’s nothing wrong with an intervention, but it was how I went about doing it because I was done with alcoholism, but that did not mean that I have control of it. Part of my journey was realizing that I was, it was not in control of others or outcomes. And once I had to start grappling with that, then it was fear.
And some of us recognize that right now the pandemic has stirred up all of the fear on the inside. And when we have a lot of things, Fear. That’s when we will try even more to control because we want to fix it. We want to force things back into place. So this is been a journey where God has had to teach me and I’ve summed it up by saying, I’ve had to learn the lesson of if it’s going to get done, God’s going to have to do it.
And that’s a hard lesson because that means that I have to let go of how I think things should be. And I also have to let go. Of of the, the fear of that I’m holding onto in order to have the faith that I need to hold onto. God’s promises.
Julie Lyles Carr: [00:11:44] Your experience as a spouse in this addiction space. You know, it’s one that I feel like we don’t really talk a lot about within our faith circles, because it doesn’t fit real neatly between the places of saying, well, someone was unfaithful to me or there was abuse in the marriage.
And then the reasons that sometimes people separate and divorce for personality reasons and people land on all kinds of places on the scale when it comes to their faith walks and their understandings about what should happen in those scenarios. The addiction lane to me seems a really tough one, because on the one hand, there I’m sure is this sense of responsibility for being the person closest and engaged who gosh, if we can just grit it through and gut it through, we can drag this person to the other side of recovery correlated against the places where sometimes someone doesn’t cooperate, if you will, or for whatever reason that’s going on with them, a predilection toward addiction or whatever recovery doesn’t happen, right. It doesn’t happen in a timeframe that can leave a family intact. What were all of the things that were going on in your mind? Because here you are, you’ve been on church staff forever.
You have this career that is very much launched into the speaking space and writing space for women under a faith journey experience. And now you are coming to the crossroads of having to make a decision, a really difficult decision with an addiction cycle. That’s been part of your marriage for quite a while, and it’s not getting better.
Can you walk us through what that journey was like?
Barb Roose: [00:13:22] I can, and the journey I wrote a blog post after our third, which ended up being our final separation in 2018. And so the progression is this. We began in secrecy and then privacy and then public. So that’s how I want it. Ram this secrecy was back in 2011 when I looked around and I thought there was something that isn’t quite right now we were a Christian family. We served at church. We were in small groups in marriage. We had a date night every week. He had a Bible, a men’s group. He went to, I had a women’s group. We had a couples group. We were tithers like, we were a Christian family. And all of the sudden I realized that something wasn’t quite right.
And I only have one trusted voice in my life at the time that I could speak with. And that was my father-in-law who has since passed away. But it was a secret for me. And what happens in secrecy when we’re struggling with something we can’t talk about, then that’s where we try to control things. That’s when we have a lot of fear because we don’t know what we’re dealing with and we can’t talk about it.
And that went on until around 2011. When I finally brought up what my concerns were to my father-in-law and he said, yes, and he was a recovering alcoholic himself. He had recovered. Then we moved onto the privacy stage. When I finally found the courage to speak up, I then started going to counseling because I had to use some words to talk about what I was going through.
Then that led me to then go, okay, who are the trusted voices in my life at that point because of what I did on staff. That’s when I then talked to my colleagues who were on the executive leadership team and the women in my small group. Was it hard and heartbreaking? Yes. When women contact me now about their spouses, 99% of them are still in the secret stage too afraid to talk about it because they do not want people to think badly of their spouse. They’re embarrassed. They are angry and we’ve got to move from secrecy to privacy. We don’t have to put our business out there. I spent a decade in privacy were the most in people, important people around me knew what was going on.
Our families knew what was going on. Not everyone reacted well. To this day, not everyone reacted well and then for me, because of what I do in ministry in 2018, I had to make it public. I finally realized that due to some, just his declining situation, the girls and I needed to move out of our house. It was not good going to be safe for us anymore.
He wasn’t abusive, but he was unable to keep himself safe. And I knew that that would eventually. There were some things that had happened where I just, I prayed for six months, he knew for six months I sat him down and said, please we can save this, but you’ve got to choose it. And he did not. Then I had to go public and going public God gave me the language to use, not to embarrass my former spouse, not to create more pain for our children and not to turn our family into a spectacle. So those three places today, if you’re listening, I want to encourage you. If you’re in the secrecy to think about what it looks to move to privacy and find some trusted voices.
Julie Lyles Carr: [00:16:48] I love the distinction there between privacy and secrecy, absolute gold, because I think sometimes it feels like we give people one of two options. Stay hidden and secret, or make your down your way down the aisle to the alter and confess it all in front of everybody and let them know what’s going on.
And I don’t know how we quite got to that place because scripture talks about going one to another and confessing our sins one to another. And so in that place, that’s a private moment that is not this place of taking a podium and expressing everything that’s going on. I love to the commitment you have had to continuing to be honest and honor your former spouse.
How have you navigated that place in which you’re being honest and you’re honoring because that is a delicate, delicate blend my friend, and I watch you up on point doing that so beautifully. How did you get there?
Barb Roose: [00:17:48] That was something I specifically prayed about. Again, this goes to the secrecy. Many women do not speak up because they do not want people to think badly of their spouse.
I worked for a large mega church. I knew that if I spoke up, I did not want my former spouse to lose his job. But I also knew that it was time to tell the truth about what was happening in our life. So I sat down and I said, God, I need you to give me the language for how to do this. And I know that there are other.
People out there who tell their stories differently and they do tell more details and, and that’s that’s between them and God, but for me as much as possible, I do not refer to a spouse in my writing. It wasn’t, it wasn’t a loved one who struggled. Um, I definitely do not use his name. My children are still living through this and they are adults.
We are making our way, God has shown up and he is healed a lot. But this is still a loss for us.
Julie Lyles Carr: [00:18:55] Right? Right. And so to be willing to honor it as such and to not keep stoking it open with things that would be inflammatory is so very important. Now, Barb, I’m not here and you’re not here to try to talk anybody into or out of a particular decision in their life.
But I know that there are women. Who may be listening, who have done all the things they’ve done, the interventions, they don’t feel safe. And yet they also feel like they have to stay because in order to move themselves to a safe place that would in some way be violating their marriage vows. I know you took this very seriously.
I know that you did not take this lightly. How did you work that process as you were taking this before God, and you weren’t trying to justify anything, but you were also trying to listen well, how did you land where you landed?
Barb Roose: [00:19:41] Well, Julie, this is probably the most crucial conversation that we as believers need to learn how to have with each other.
So this, if you’re listening out there, what I need you to know is this is not prescriptive. There, there is not a, there’s not a magic checklist for this process. As I talk about secrecy to privacy. For many years before we moved out that last time there were trusted voices in my life. So this process was something that unfolded over time.
There was eight years of counseling involved. There was. Four years of Alanon involved. There was the staff, the pastoral team at my church. There were my women in my accountability group, my accountability partner I met with every week. All of these individuals were a regular part of my life that walked beside me.
There was a point at which the pressure and the pain. And the realization that we, I narrowed it down into a language of there’s emergencies and game changers. And when I looked at my life, especially when you live in the crisis of addiction, there are a lot of events that pop up and I had to figure out and go, is this an emergency or is this a game changer?
An emergency is a bad thing that needs to be addressed. A game changer is a matter of safety, mental health. It’s either physical safety or mental safety. And so what I realized was that there were emergencies, those were hard to handle, but at the point at which there was a game changer, then I had to sit down with my spouse and say, We now have to start a four month clock and I sat down, it was a calm conversation, uh, an emergency had just happened the day before. And I said, we’ve got four months now. My kids were older. That’s a difference. If kids are younger. I believe that the window should be tightened because, um, it’s, my kids had the ability to leave the house. And one was an adult. One was a junior in high school when children are smaller.
Um, Hmm. Moms, you’ve got to think much carefully about, about figuring that out sooner, but I allowed four months in prayed every day and said, God, please save us from this decision. God do not make us have to do this. God. You’re the God that restored. And I had a plan and I did not want to activate that plan.
And there was a second game changer the day before the plan expired that communicated to me that it was time, time to go. So there were points at which. Again, trusted voices. Then there has to be a moment of having a conversation and then there has to be a plan in case something needs to happen. And just because we moved out, I still want to, I said, God, you can still rescue us.
You can still change us. My spouse stopped having communication, but even up until now a month before our divorce was final and the divorce took. Oh, it took a year. I was willing to put the work into the years it would take for us to, to get things back on track. And consistently my spouse said, no, he was done.
Julie Lyles Carr: [00:23:08] And so that was it. Do you feel like trying to parse language or justify anything or make anybody uncomfortable? But it feels like to me, almost the process, when I have had friends who have walked through an addiction cycle with a spouse, It is a certain level of infidelity to some point because it is a choosing.
Now I understand there are people who are genetically predisposed. I am not trying to shame anyone who’s in an addiction cycle. Please hear that. But there does come a point where when that addiction becomes the primary relationship in someone’s life, it can crowd out having another spousal relationship in a sense, is that how you began to feel and what did you do with that emotion?
Because again, I think those of us who walk in faith, you’re like, am I just trying to justify this? Am I just trying to throw my hands up and go, I just can’t deal with this anymore. How was that for you?
Barb Roose: [00:24:01] That was the, that was the hardest part of it all. That was the most painful, devastating part. When we got married, uh, I fully planned to dance with my spouse at my children’s weddings. I fully planned to celebrate my 50th anniversary. We had just celebrated our 20th wedding, 25th wedding anniversary. And while we were in bad shape, I said, God, Lord helped me figure out how to stay in this so that I don’t have to let go of someone who has been such an important part of my life. But for me to this day, pop can opening our trigger for me.
I used to sleep for a long time with earplugs. Because the sound of hearing it, my former spouse never drank openly in front of us. If you went into our home, there was never alcohol in the fridge. He did not go to bars. He was one of those genetically predisposed people. He had an addiction and he was unwilling to accept the help that he needed.
He hid alcohol in places in our home where we couldn’t find it. Well, when I would hear him open that beer can in the middle of the night. It felt like it was him entertaining another woman and it felt, um, it was, it was crushing over and over and over again every day.
Julie Lyles Carr: [00:25:29] And I can understand why that would be the sound that would be kind of a siren call for something that was so incredibly hurtful.
So we’ve unpacked what this journey has been like. And then you went through the divorce process. Here’s what’s interesting is I’ve only known you really primarily post-divorce. I think that the proceedings might’ve been going on one of the first times that we met, but I’ve only known you post and you are one of the most joyful hopeful excited people. I know. So as much hard as you have been through, I’ve also primarily known you completely on the other side, and you are not someone that I have ever experienced. You’re very honest about your experience, but you don’t seem to drag around and think that this was it. How did you hang on to hope or reignite hope in the wake of what you said was both the chasm opening up and then, and then fire and then an explosion and all the things that generated from that 2015 that was so crazy.
Barb Roose: [00:26:25] It really came down to the willingness to believe God’s promises for my life. And for people who are listening out there, they’re like, really? Yeah. Yes. There was a, there was something that I began doing that I still carry through most days of the week. I finally labeled it for one of my Bible studies.
I call it God morning. And so the way that our lives worked during the addiction years was my former spouse worked third shift, which meant that when he came home in the morning, I began my day with someone who was intoxicated when I first woke up. That was how I started every day. So I realized that I would need something greater than myself to give me what I needed to hold on during the day.
So I began repeating five Bible verses to myself every morning, before I opened up my eyes before I began the day. And those verses were verses that were verses, filled with hope reminders of God’s love for me versus about faith. And so if you want to out there do this, I call it God morning and you can get a note card.
Are Google promises of God. And write them down. And first I had them posted on the bathroom mirror. Why? Because I had to brush my teeth twice a day. We should be brushing our teeth and when I was brushing my teeth I would read these promises out loud, wipe off the mirror afterwards, but. I needed to start with the life giving words of God.
And I did this every day, so that what I saw in front of me was not my entire reality. I was reminded of a God that loved me, and that saw me. And as I did that, that helped my heart be open and receptive to the other things that I was doing in my life. Counseling, accountability, I had friends that walked with me so strongly because, uh, because I lost so much family in the process, but I needed to have a discipline for myself.
And that one discipline gave me my life back.
Julie Lyles Carr: [00:28:34] You’ve talked about. So poignantly of course, in a season where things feel so out of control, wanting to control so many things, obviously, and you’ve talked very poignantly about five controlling personality habits that we can fall into, or five categories of things that we can tend to fall into.
And you liken it to shine to give it an acronym. Can you unpack those five things? I think this is so powerful to really do a self analysis of yes, we may have very. Real reasons for wanting to try to hang on to control. It may be a situation as, as deep and as hurtful and as dramatic as what you Barb went through in 2015, it may be the simple frustration in a sense of kids home and not knowing when they’re gonna go back to school and trying to keep all the work things going at the same time, which I say simple.
But what I mean by that is. It’s, you know, it doesn’t sound quite as dramatic as people who are going through much tougher stuff. And yet at the same time, it counts and it can trigger us into a place of feeling like we’re trying to grasp control. So what are those five things that you’ve come up with to describe the places that are easy for us to fall into wanting to engage in controlling behaviors?
Barb Roose: [00:29:40] Yes. I call it the shine acronym and shine. It comes from this idea of, we want to, we want to make it all about us. Yes. So the S stands for stonewalling. That’s digging our feet in. It’s a control loving behavior when people are trying to do things and we’re just being stubborn. The H stands for helicoptering micro managing. The I stands for interrupting, whether it’s interrupting with words or interfering with people’s lives, the N stands for nagging. I don’t even need to explain that. And then the E is for excessive planning or excessive stockpiling. It’s when we go out and we try to create this insurance against uncertainty.
And I develop those when I thought about my life, when I thought about how I tried to control that when I was afraid. Yeah, I would resort to one or two or three or four or all five of those things.
Julie Lyles Carr: [00:30:42] How do we begin to overcome? Because I’m sure that somebody had an aha moment. And particularly, of course, because we’re recording this in a time of COVID.
We have definitely seen people trying to control through a lot of things, but particularly the E where we’re doing excessive stockpiling of all the things. And we see what an interrupter that can be in our economy and everything else. How do we begin to, once we’ve identified the place where we feel like we’ve got some issues, what do we do?
You know, a lot of times, Barbara, I think we can be really good at maybe identifying and being honest about, Oh yeah. That’s where I struggle. But then sometimes we have a hard time with the followup. It’s almost like we give ourselves permission when we go, Oh, well I’m a, this personality or I’m of that personality.
And so that’s just who I am, but we don’t want to stay here. We don’t want to live here forever and ever. So how do we begin to unpack that?
Barb Roose: [00:31:29] Well, the very first step is willingness because I have heard from women forever who go, Oh, I’m just a control freak, or I try to control everything. And so, like you said, it’s so easy to settle into that identity, but willingness is recognizing and going.
This is not working for me. Like I think that it is. But I find that people in my life do not like being fixed. I find that I am stressed out when I try to control things. So that very first pieces am I willing to realize that this is not working for me because without willingness, you’re going to keep controlling stuff.
Then once there’s willingness in the Surrendered Bible study, I developed his six surrender principles and it’s mad about a plan of letting go, but it’s more of an ongoing practice because practice means it’s like yoga. It’s when you do something over and over again, your muscles develop a familiarity. We are awesome at trying to control because we practice it all of the time.
If you are a nagger, you are practicing it. So these surrender principles create a different practice. And so just a couple of them. Number one is I’m not in control of others around out. I practice that when I look I’ve got a college student who. Boomeranged back into the apartment. She’s 20 years old. If she sleeps till 1:00 PM and I feel like I want to say something because I don’t think she should be. And I’m like, Barb, you are not in control of others or outcome she’s 20 years old. And so I use that as a practice to remind me. But that’s her life. Number two is I choose to live by faith, not rush to follow my feelings. We’ve all been afraid or had pride in.
We went with our feelings that we screamed and yelled at people. But we just went, wait a minute. That created a lot of problems afterwards. We’re going to live by faith and that choose to follow our feelings. And then my favorite they’re six, but I’m just talking about three. My favorite is I can always let go and give my problems to God.
And I wrote this because often we pray and we give things to God. And then. Julie, have you ever gone to get something back from God after you gave it to him?
Julie Lyles Carr: [00:33:54] I Try real hard. Not to do that. Sometimes I do seem to think that I maybe should circle back. Cause I, maybe I could deal with it a little. Maybe it got stuck under his to do list his pile somewhere.
I learned real quick that I just need to leave it.
Barb Roose: [00:34:09] We know that we should leave things with God. But like you said, sometimes we go, well, God’s not getting to that. So I’m going to go back and grab it. So I can always let go. That’s a place of freedom that we don’t need to judge ourselves. If we do fall into a control loving behavior, we don’t have to beat ourselves up for it.
We simply go, God, I took that back, but I’m going to give it back again. I’m going to give it to you. Yeah, just three of the six surrender principles that help us practice letting go of control and living like Jesus did.
Julie Lyles Carr: [00:34:45] I love that. And Barb’s referring to her Bible study Surrendered, and she also has a new devotional that’s come out called Surrendered from Abingdon women. It’s absolutely incredible.
Barb Roose: [00:34:53] Thank you for having me check it out. Show notes where you can connect with our guests and find out more. Do me a favor and subscribe and share the podcast. Wherever you get your podcasts from and leave a five star rating and review it helps get the word out about the podcast.
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Go to allmomdoes.com For an awesome resource and community for women walking through many of the same things you do with kids and spouses and work and faith. It’s such a great place for you to connect and refresh. I’ll see you next week with another fantastic episode of the allmomdoes Podcast
