We’ve all had a few hours to ourselves – whether it’s late at night after the kids go to bed, a leisurely coffee date with a friend, or the gift of a “day off” with no motherhood responsibilities – and then returned to parenthood more exhausted than ever. The time we spent in self-care wasn’t rejuvenating at all.
That’s because rest time is only restful if we’re intentional about the way we use it. We all have a list of things we’d do if we got some time to ourselves, basically turning our downtime into a frantic time of productivity and checking off to-dos. Or we see lists of things that seem like good self-care activities, but if we’re honest with ourselves they don’t really refresh us the way we’d like.
The key to making that rest time truly restful is to know ourselves and be honest with ourselves about what we find truly restful. Even if that activity doesn’t seem particularly virtuous to others.
For example? I love watching TV. If I get time to myself, that’s what I’ll do. And for me, it’s completely satisfying. Sure, I enjoy reading books – but once I start one, I can’t stop. I can’t just put it down once my free time is over. I’ll ignore my kids, forget to cook dinner, and sacrifice sleep to get to the last page and see how the whole thing wraps up.
So obviously, starting a book on my downtime wouldn’t result in a whole lot of positive outcomes later. I have a friend who hardly ever watches TV; after a long day at work she prefers to scroll through social media and catch up on her friends. I spend all day on social media for work and can’t log off soon enough. I have another friend who could spend hours soaking in her hot tub. I’m done after ten minutes and kind of hate the whole process of taking off a wet swimsuit.
Mom, know yourself. Know what satisfies you and what truly rejuvenates you. Don’t worry about what you “should” do for self-care, what others think about your choice of activity, or whether it’s Instagram worthy.
- If you genuinely love working out, go for a run. If you only do it to take care of your body (which is healthy and notable and great) but you need true downtime, skip it once in awhile.
- If you’re an introvert and your nail tech will talk your ear off during your manicure, bring your earbuds and listen to music.
- If you love curling up with a good book, choose that when your free time rolls around.
- And if binge-watching the latest series is what does the trick for you, grab that remote and get comfy.
Productivity is good. But so is rest. And when those fleeting moments come around, use them intentionally in a way that satisfies you. Don’t waste those minutes doing something that’s not going to truly rejuvenate you and will make you feel like your downtime was wasted.
What activities do you find truly restful and rejuvenating?
