Moms put in a lot of effort to keep things running smoothly. This is true all year long, but summertime sure has the potential to add a layer of chaos to even the most well-intentioned, well organized households. Schedules are different and routines have been altered. The predictable school days have transformed into summer camps, family trips, swimming pools, and long evenings. We have all these ideas of how summer will go, don’t we? Maybe how we will be more patient, more relaxed, and more fun as we enjoy summer with our sweet children. As with many things in motherhood and life in general, what we want to happen and what actually happens are often very different things!
Despite our best efforts, kids just have a way of adding a dash of disarray to a situation. Even the simplest of things can quickly take a turn for the worst.
You switch on the sprinklers, sunscreen the kids, and within two minutes your toddler walks right into the bark getting splinters in his feet. Splinters that he will NOT let you remove. We will have to race to shut the windows because the neighbors will surely think we are amputating a leg as the poor guy cries his lungs out. The picture I had in my mind of him happily toddling through the grass and laughing as the water misted his sun-kissed face was quickly shattered.
My goal each summer is to have the kids play outside as much as possible while finding their own things to do. That might sound like a piece of cake, but the kids of today are so used to immediate results and having entertainment available at a moment’s notice that this isn’t as simple of a request as it should be!
My boys love being outside. Even though they love it, there is still a resistance to heading out sometimes. “Go play with the dog” The dog is boring. “Go ride bikes” It’s too hot to ride bikes. “Go play in the pool” The pool is too cold. “Fine, go sit in the grass and do nothing!” Then they sigh and drag their feet out the door.
I’m glad they have nothing to do. Even though that’s not true of course and they are beyond fortunate to have bikes, a dog, a pool, and each other, I’m glad they can go outside and create their own adventures. Those were some of my favorite times as a kid. It might take a few minutes to get their wheels turning and me telling them that they aren’t allowed inside until lunch, but once they get going-the possibilities are endless.
Sure, they play some video games and watch a movie here and there. They have summer reading and their daily chores. We have camping trips and family time planned. But in the end, some of the best memories they make are the ones spent outside with no specific plans.
My ten year old might end up climbing the neighbor’s tree with a ratchet strap to make a swing for his little brother and my toddler might be standing in the watering can with his shoes and socks on. Venturing out to my garden with an iced coffee might end in disaster as someone gets stung by a bee and the baby wakes up early from his nap. In fact, most days the ice has long melted by the time I can gulp it down, so I should probably just refer to it as “room-temperature coffee” at this point.
Each season brings its own flurry of challenges. Whether you just had a lovely outing to the park on this fine summer day, or you’re screaming into a pillow because you can’t take one more second of the whining and bickering, summer is certainly a wild card with little kids! If you believe that your children are the only ones fighting or driving you crazy today, or you’re feeling guilty because you lost your temper(again!), or you’re just frustrated that the summer hasn’t been going the way you had hoped, I promise you it is NOT just your family!
There have been times when we get into the car for an outing and the stress level is so unbelievably high, even though we are supposed to be going somewhere fun. My husband will look over at me and say, “Why did we even bother leaving the house?!” Oh man, how it can feel like that sometimes! Life with kids can be dysfunctional, no matter how we think it SHOULD be going or how they SHOULD behave. Different ages, different personalities, and different summer routines occasionally make for kind of a mess. I’m not nearly as patient of a mother as I thought I would be, and my expectations being shattered at times during the summer months really test that!
There is no perfect way to spend the summer and there is also no way of knowing what your day with little ones is going to hold. Some are sweet and full of fun, some are stressful and not what we had hoped for. I don’t have the perfect solution to end the whining, to make siblings get along, or to ensure that your kids enjoy their time outside. What I am confident we can do as mothers is try to be more patient, more kind, and encourage our kiddos to find their own fun sometimes. It certainly couldn’t hurt!
Ephesians 4:2-3 With all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing tolerance for one another in love. Being diligent to preserve the unity of the spirit in the bond of peace.
Humility, tolerance, patience, and preservation of peace. These are the qualities we can strive to show our children, these are the things that without a doubt will make a difference in our lives and in theirs-in summertime and beyond!
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