When I was growing up, my brother who is four years older than me, would often try to fill my head with ridiculous fears like telling me that sharks can make their way into swimming pools through the filters. He was exceptional at his job of big brother when it came to, often successful attempts, to terrorize me. He was also very sweet to me, some days, which is probably why I believed 95% of the things he told me.
I was recently swimming with my kids and as I dove down to grab a sinker toy, a thought creeped into my head. What if a shark really did make its way into the swimming pool? Obviously, I know this isn’t going to happen but there was a tiny part of me that still believes it just might be a possibility.
These irrational fears that I still carry decades out of my childhood probably also explain why I cannot watch scary movies. Even the ones that people claim are cheesy and almost funny at how unrealistic they are. Nope. To me, they are still terrifying.
Isn’t it crazy how even irrational fears from our childhood can stick with us well into adulthood? I’m guessing I am not alone in that.
My 10-year old daughter is currently obsessed with all the Jurassic Park movies. While I am convinced that a T Rex absolutely could be in our garage in the middle of the night, she doesn’t seem at all phased. Perhaps it skipped a generation and she will have a much more level head than I clearly do.
I wonder what fears, big or small, are currently being shaped in my kids heads that will stick with them decades from now. I hope it’s the small irrational thoughts that fill their heads from time-to-time versus the big more real fears. Not that I love being an adult who thinks that there could possibly be a monster under the bed but at least I can quickly put the fear to rest knowing that is not actually going to happen. I think I would categorize those fears as almost meaningless.
GettyImages | Courtneyk
When life throws actual problems my way, those are the real moments of fear creeping in. I would like to say I immediately give it to God and trust in His plan. But I often don’t. I internalize, I worry and I become fearful of all the possible outcomes of the situation.
When I take a step back to breathe, that is always when God steps in. God doesn’t always provide me with an answer or solution. But He always provides me some sort of clarity even in the darkest times.
When I am afraid, I put my trust in You. In God, whose word I praise—in God I trust. I will not be afraid. What can man do to me? (Psalm 56:3-4)
For I, the LORD your God, hold your right hand; it is I who say to you, Fear not, I am the one who helps you. (Isaiah 41:13)
I cannot control all the experiences my kids have in life to magically ensure they’re not negative or scary or sad or painful. Those experiences are what life is made up of. I often pray that my kids will remember to trust in God and that they remember to do so quicker than I sometimes do.
There is pain and fear in this world and there is no way to avoid it. Some is shorter lived and somewhat insignificant; though in the moment can feel big. Other pain and fears can be massive and life-changing. But in it all, God is holding our hand and with us. Feeling that pain with us.
I don’t know what somewhat insignificant fears might be shaping in my kids right now that will stick with them, much like my shark in the pool fears. I also don’t know what real pain lies ahead and what we could be hit with tomorrow that we don’t see coming today.
I find such comfort in verses like John 14:27 to be reminded that we can’t live today fearful of tomorrow. We can find peace in God, even when the answers are not as clear as we may want them to be.
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid. (John 14:27)
Do you have irrational fears that creep up from time to time? Are they as ridiculous as some of mine? Are you in a season of massive pain and fear in life? We’d love to connect with you through AllMomDoes!
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