Just in case you haven’t been following along, I’ve been working on instilling contentment in my teens and last week I suggested 6 activities that might help with this.
One of the suggestions was to spend more time with family and we have been making plans to do some day trips together while my husband is on vacation.
However God had different plans…
It’s been truly on my heart lately to share my “story/testimony” with my 16 ½ year old daughter. Except my story isn’t one that you just start chit chattin about because it’s long, crazy, weird, crazy, sad, crazy…well you get the picture. I’ve even been thinking of just writing her a letter but have been putting it off.
You see I don’t like to “appear” to my children as having ever been the sickest, saddest, addicted woman you could ever meet. Someone whose life was such a mess that I was sure that even God could not mop it up. My kids know I had a hard childhood and know about me being in recovery for the past 30 years, but the details…well I keep that stuff under wraps.
There may be a hint of pride in there but there is also much shame and embarrassment. God has brought me to a place in my life where I can joyfully and willingly share my testimony to help others…but share with my kids?! I just don’t like to.
But God…
When He stirs something in your heart and even if you don’t move on it…He will find a way to make it happen…and so He did.
One morning, very early in the morning…which was totally odd, my daughter was up with me. She started a conversation with me and then asked me a question. I can’t even remember what the question was. I felt that stirring in my heart and I tried to hold back and then all of a sudden I said something like “you know God has been putting on my heart that I should share my story with you.” I had no idea what the reaction might be. A rolling of the eyes or a “how boring!”
But nope.
“Really?” she said “I wanna hear everything!” She’s that way…she loves all the details.
Story by story, detail by detail, I watched as her mouth dropped, her eyes teared up and her questions came barreling out. She was shocked and saddened.
“You’ve got to write a book, Mom!” was mostly her response.
At 1:00 in the afternoon we realized we were both still in our pajamas and starving for lunch. What was meant to be a few minutes had become hours. We decided to put things on pause for another “date.”
It had been so much for her to absorb, but it left her longing to know me more.
The biggest surprise to me is that her attitude has all of a sudden changed. She has turned from being a stubborn, discontent teen into a caring content person that is choosing to obey and help cheerfully around our house. (I hope it lasts!) LOL
It is a funny thing, today I am still the same Mom I was yesterday and yet my relationship with my daughter is changed forever. Maybe the hard things she is going through don’t seem so bad or maybe the grace of God and his mighty mercy were a relief to her thirsty soul.
One thing I know for sure, God always gets His way, and His way is always right.
