We all want the very best for our children, but it’s impossible to do everything right all the time. Admitting that is freeing – and it’s also encouraging to other moms in the midst of intense seasons. That’s the idea behind our Monday Mom Confessions and we’d love for you to join us – share your own confession in the comments below! Let’s throw off the weight of perfection and get real around here!
Ten years ago, I was a new bride getting ready to host my very first Thanksgiving. I went all out. I cooked for three days. I took time off work. We rented additional tables and seating, and rearranged the furniture in our little condo to make space.
And to be honest, I loved it.
I love cooking. I love serving. I love hosting. It was fun. There’s nothing wrong with any of that.
But now that I look back, I think there was also another element. I was trying to prove my worth as a person. As a new wife. As a real live grown-up adult. It wasn’t because anyone made me feel unworthy. It was all internal, the feeling that I had to prove myself.
And if I admit it, I’ve been doing the same thing for far, far too long. I didn’t let friends in my house unless it was clean. I never brought store-bought food to a potluck. I spent enormous amounts of energy trying to look like I had it all together.
I wanted to prove I was worthy. Partly to myself, partly to others. I was a worthwhile person. I was a worthwhile wife. I was a worthwhile mother. See?!? I’ve got things together. I’m worthy!
Fast forward to today and I’m over it. I’ve gotten to a point where I can honestly say that I don’t care. I hate that it’s taken so long, but now I’m all take-it-or-leave-it, this is me. I’ve realized I don’t have to earn or prove my worth to anyone.
This year I’m making Thanksgiving dinner for my family again – just the four of us this time. And we’ll be having chicken in a crock pot, canned gravy, and homemade stuffing. But the stuffing won’t be homemade because I think it has to be in order to be considered a proper Thanksgiving. It will be homemade because I love cooking and I love eating homemade stuffing.
{Those are the only reasons you should ever make homemade stuffing anyway.}
Someday soon I hope to host another big family holiday. And when I do, I’ll probably go all out. Because I love it and it’s enjoyable for me.
And there’s nothing wrong with hosting the perfect Thanksgiving.
As long as you’re not doing it to prove anything to anybody – least of all yourself. Because you don’t need to.
You’re enough.
What’s your Monday Mom Confession? Tell us in the comments!
Would you like to be featured on Monday Mom Confessions? We’re looking for guest writers; email us at comments@allmomdoes.com with your 1-2 sentence confession. If it’s approved you’ll be asked to write the full article and it will be published on allmomdoes!
