Read more of Stephanie’s contributions to allmomdoes here.
Pre-Pandemic, the art of balancing parenthood with other roles in life was something often talked about. Ways to balance work with raising little ones. Ways to balance other relationships in the midst of parenting. It was constantly something I was trying to perfect; though we all know any sort of exact balance simply doesn’t exist. Yet, we strived for it. We talked about it. We wrote about it. We often felt like we failed on days where one role clearly out won the other. In a life full of different roles like work, parenthood and marriage, the challenge of balancing was part of our every day.
Until our everyday norm was completely rocked.
When the pandemic hit nine months ago, I think we all were still in that mindset of balancing. Almost as though Coronavirus was yet another ball we would just juggle along with all the others. Then the juggling got a lot more challenging with things like school closures and, for some states, lock down. Yet we still tried to find our way through it all. On some days, we pretended schooling at home while managing a career was going to work. Other days, we admitted it clearly wasn’t. But the back and forth of emotions and trying figure it all out still meant we were trying to find balance.
Until we realized we couldn’t.
I don’t know about you but one of the intangible things COVID-19 has taken away from me is any attempt to find balance in life. At first this was tough for me to swallow. It was yet one more thing that was taken away. What was also tough to swallow was what it was replaced with. The balancing act has been replaced with the survival act. I no longer try to juggle things on a daily basis. Instead, I try to get from one day to the next. There is no striving to succeed in one area and then another the next day. There is basically just trying to not entirely fail.
A goal to survive, initially, seemed downright depressing. Is that really what this year has come to? But similar to when I found freedom when I stopped trying to organize my days or when I quit trying to forecast the future and the end of this pandemic, I honestly am finding it’s easier to breath when I just succumb to making survival my daily task. When you think about it, it’s much easier to survive than to find balance. I can actually wrap up each day knowing I made it through. The days where things click and we have small wins, I can celebrate those wins and celebrate surviving. Even days that don’t go well. Even when there are tears. Even when I am exhausted. I can remind myself that I made it through and I will make it through tomorrow.
I wonder when we are out of this pandemic if I will be able to find value in the challenge of surviving. Or if I will feel the pressure to go back to trying to achieve some balance that I know deep down can never actually be perfect. I wonder if I will be eager to throw those balls back into the air and start juggling or if COVID-19 taking away my ability to aim for balance will end up having a positive long-term impact.
Do you still aim for balance in the midst of this pandemic? We’d love to hear from you and to check in!
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