Comfort and Joy
We hear those words a lot during the Christmas season, don’t we? We listen to cheerful, nostalgic Christmas songs on repeat, trying to soak up as much comfort and joy as we can before New Year’s Day. Some of us wait all year long for the traditions, excitement, and wonder that December brings. We reflect on the birth of our Savior and enjoy the spirit of giving, time with family, lights all aglow, and tree farms.
I love all things Christmas. I actually think about Christmas in July, and when autumn rolls around I feel like I might burst with anticipation of the approaching holiday season! Celebrating Christmas with my family is one of the greatest gifts and the memories are priceless. As an adult, I was surprised to find that for many moms, the pressure and chaos of “The Most Wonderful Time of the Year” was stealing some of that joy. Despite being surrounded by Christmas cheer, there is still a potential for stress to creep in if we let it.
Photo: iStock | Fotostorm
I’m not just talking about the financial stress that a lot of families experience with gift-buying and party preparations, or the mad rush to have everything planned and wrapped in time for December 25th. A good portion of the stress I have witnessed among mothers and felt myself at times, was that of family get-togethers. What?! You might think that sounds insane, or maybe you are nodding your head right now and saying, “Yep!” It’s true. For a lot of families, as much as they love their loved ones, holiday gatherings can cause some anxiety. If I were going to really dive into that concept, this article would quickly turn into a five-hundred-page novel.
Fortunately, I am just going to focus on one piece of it for now. If you are anything like most families, traditions matter this time of year. Maybe you have been able to continue Christmas traditions from your childhood, maybe you have also embraced traditions from your husband’s side of the family all while mixing in some new ones with your own children.
I have been in awe of how much some moms are able to fit into the weeks leading up to Christmas! Maybe that is you and you are in your element with all the hustle and bustle. Or maybe you are stuck trying to coordinate five family Christmases and hardly have a chance to glance at your Christmas tree until it is time to take it all down and say, “Happy New Year!”
Photo: iStock | Anandabgd
Once my husband and I had children of our own we quickly realized it would take some planning to hold on to comfort and joy during the holidays. It’s not always easy to change tradition, but sometimes, for the sake of your own sanity and the peace that you are trying to preserve for your immediate family, it is necessary. Many of us feel pressure not to throw a wrench in someone’s plans. Especially the Christmas Eve dinner that your grandmother invites you to every year or the Christmas brunch with your parents the next morning. Maybe after that, you drive a few hours to see your in-laws at another big gathering. All of this while simultaneously trying to create a special Christmas for your own children. It is a lot to coordinate and can leave you and your kids exhausted; who to see which day and which year, rotating families or trying to fit it all in at once. It makes your head spin, but it doesn’t have to.
If it’s too much for your family, it’s ok to change plans, even at Christmastime! The last thing you want, is to wake up on December 26th and feel that there was supposed to be more to this season, and you ran out of time to find it. If it is important to you to have a quiet, special Christmas eve with your husband and children, it is ok to advocate for that! If you host thirty people at your house every year and feel like you don’t even see your spouse or children all Christmas Day, it is ok to plan a smaller gathering! Offer alternatives if you can so your extended family can still get together, even if it’s the week before or a Christmas Eve brunch instead of a dinner.
If personalities clash or you’re dealing with difficult dynamics, try to focus on Romans 12:18. I feel like this verse is so applicable to the holiday season: “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” We can’t please every family member or commit to every plan, but we can ensure that our actions and words are peaceful. Regardless of sticky family situations that can in fact surface during the holidays, do what YOU can to keep the peace, and let go of the rest.
Photo: iStock | Pavlo-Piatybrat
“And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord.” Luke 2:10-11 Good tidings and great joy. Remember those words and let them soak in this December. We were given the most incredible gift that night in a stable so long ago. As we celebrate the birth of Jesus and the traditions that are near and dear to our hearts this season, let’s not allow the busyness to steal our comfort and joy.
We can show our children how to be still and appreciate every beautiful, magical moment that Christmas brings. Sip cocoa with extra marshmallows, marvel at the keepsake ornaments on your Christmas tree and all of the sweet moments that went into decorating it, smile when your preschooler adds his Batman toy to the Nativity scene because he wanted him to visit Baby Jesus, and above all-let it move you. Let the Spirit of Christmas fill your soul. Slow down, even if it’s for one weekend of the season. You and your children will not regret it!
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Read more of Maria’s contributions to AllMomDoes here.
