When COVID-19 began attacking our family over a week ago, I couldn’t find an emoji sad and heartbroken enough to express my feelings. Right now, my 70 year old mom is fighting back to life in the ICU. My grandma, almost 90, is in another hospital, confused and homesick. My dad, who is 70 and still runs several times a week, is recovering at home with the mildest case of all three.
MA’s Story
Dad and MA were diagnosed with COVID days apart. They made a trip to the ER when MA began experiencing shortness of breath and the oximeter from CVS (more on that later) confirmed her low oxygen levels. They were in fact, dangerously low. Immediately, MA began a five-day regimen of the powerful drug Remdesivir and a couple days later received the precious antibodies donated by a COVID survivor. (As in MA’s case, this incalculable gift often makes patients feel worse before making them feel better). MA moved from the COVID unit, to the progressive care unit, to the intensive care unit over the course of eight days.
Nanny Gloria’s Story
My grandmother was transported by ambulance to the hospital to begin a regiment of Remdesivir and IV fluids for dehydration. Prior to being admitted, she ate only half a waffle and drank a very little bit in the span of six days. Nanny doesn’t understand how she contracted COVID, forgets the name of this terrible disease she has, and says she can’t breathe even though her oxygen levels are fine. Thank God she has her Jitterbug cell phone beside her, so we keep encouraging her and explaining things. She is sadly disoriented, yet her vitals are good. We are praying that God will bring Nanny safely home to her comfy chair, or Home to Heaven to be with the Lord. That is her dearest wish.
Prayer is Powerful and Effective
It’s heart wrenching to know that you can’t help the people you would do anything for under any other circumstances. But you can PRAY and ask every praying person you know to join you over text and social media. You will literally feel the prayers and love poured over you and your family.
MA and Nanny are alone in rooms with closed doors due to COVID regulations. Nanny keeps asking to “go in the hallway.” Hospital rules are necessary but cruel. You cannot offer the gift of your presence to your loved one, but prayers can enter places we can’t right now. So, I remember how awesome nurses are and I pray and believe that the Holy Spirit will saturate MA and Nanny’s hospital rooms. You can rest in this truth: Jesus will never leave your loved one or you. He is with us all. All the time.
The One Word Prayer That’s Enough
On Saturday, MA’s condition worsened to the point that we feared losing her. I walked along the Sound through a misting rain, which camouflaged my tears. It felt like God’s hand was on my heart, preventing it from breaking, shielding me. During the long night, a fiery wall of pain surrounded my heart. It throbbed, as my thoughts probed the unimaginable. Sometimes all you can say is the Name of “Jesus.” That one word is a prayer itself. Lean into it.
Bible Verses to Cling to:
“The LORD is close to the brokenhearted; He rescues those whose spirits are crushed.” -Psalm 34:18
“Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with My victorious right hand.” -Isaiah 41:10
“But in my distress I cried out to the LORD; yes, I prayed to my God for help. He heard me from His sanctuary; my cry to Him reached His ears.” -Psalm 18:6
“The Lord redeems the life of His servants; none of those who take refuge in Him will be condemned.” -Psalm 34:22
“Yet I am confident I will see the LORD’s goodness while I am here in the land of the living.” -Psalm 27:13
Every psalm. All the psalms.
Alex, I’ll take HOPE for $1,000!
Select hope from all the choices in your mind. It’s hard. Imagine a positive scene to look forward to if you can’t. Better yet, ask a child to draw a hopeful picture of your loved one home and well. My amazing niece Kenzie drew a picture of the ambulance bringing her grandma home!
Dad tells MA he’s polishing the floors for when his “beautiful wife comes home.” And he really is!
My sister Kimmie likes to visualize all of us gathered around our parents’ glorious Christmas tree; and MA shining brighter than the star at the top.
I like envisioning angels camped in MA and Nanny’s hospital rooms. I pray they hear the rustle of heavenly wings on their pillows.
Keep a GRATITUDE Note on Your iPhone
Jot a lot. Here’s what my list looks like:
- Thankful for COVID survivors who donated their antibodies to literally give MA LIFE
- Thankful Nanny can make and receive calls
- Thankful that MA is cognizant enough to ask about her grandkids
- Thankful our dear friend Nurse Heather picked up a shift at MA’s hospital two weeks before she was admitted – seeing her beautiful face was good medicine
- Thankful for nurses who are patient with and kind to family members of their patients
- Thankful for amazing and friends who pray/message/call/post encouraging words and bible verses
- Thankful for friends and family who “check in” via text and ask how we’re holding up
When a Loved One Tests Positive for COVID, Prepare for a Possible Hospital Visit
Critical: Select a password as a family. Should your loved one be admitted, the hospital admission staff will ask for a password. Anyone who calls to inquire after a patient will need the password in order to communicate with the nurses. It’s wise to keep it simple. If your loved one is elderly, forgetful, or anxious about entering the hospital, write the password down and hand it to the EMT who comes to the house, or the person who escorts your loved one into the hospital. Hand a copy to your loved one too, or text it right away.
My grandmother did not choose an obvious password. She selected the name of a puppy from her childhood and then understandably, forgot it. The doctor could not communicate with my dad until this was straightened out.
Pick up a Fingertip Pulse Oximeter at your local drugstore or have one delivered. It’s actually easy to operate. The oximeter will monitor your loved one’s blood oxygen levels and you’ll stay ahead of the game. My aunt had one of these devices delivered to my parents’ home from CVS and it played a significant role in their decision to take MA to the hospital.
Keep your loved one’s cell phone charged up and ready to go. It is difficult to have to enter the ER alone during COVID times, especially when you’re sick. That cell phone will prove to be a lifeline, even if it’s just in the short term.
Things to Send to the Hospital Room When Your Loved One is Admitted:
- Their cell phone or iPad WITH the charger
- A post it note with 3 or 4 short words of hope like, “BE NOT AFRAID”
- Actual photographs of the people (and pets) they love, plus scotch tape to affix them to the bed or snack table
- Their bible, the one with all the notes in the margins… or offer to download a bible app on their cell phone
A Few Things to Remember:
Our frontline heroes have learned how to treat COVID so much better now. There are many new drugs and treatments as simple as tummy sleep that will help your loved one. And a ventilator is not always the end of the story. People do come off them and LIVE. It helps me when the subject is discussed, to call it a breathing tube.
“God is not deaf to our prayers!” That was a wonderful text I received from my dad. God hears your cries even when you whisper, even when you are too broken-hearted to speak. He’s right there, close as your next breath.
