If Only I Had Known That I Could Laugh About Such Things

Raising teens can be a challenging and emotionally draining time. They often will challenge you on every established rule you’ve had in place for years. The constant battles and hormonal outbursts can challenge even the most seasoned of moms.

Quite often there is a power shift that occurs when kids become teens. Just to ease the tension, some parents will give in and allow their teenagers way more power than they should just to keep the peace. This sets a dangerous precedent that is not good for the parent OR the child.

Instead of getting overwhelmed, why not use humor with your teens?

Here are some examples of what I mean:

Teens are notoriously hard to get up in the morning, so my husband bought an old bugle and “played” it (it could hardly be called playing) outside the kids’ rooms. They yelled and complained, but they still laugh about it now!

On weekends, we tuned the radio onto a channel that played polka music all morning. The teens got to wake up to the sounds of accordions and tubas blasting through the house. It started our days off with laughter.

A friend of mine remembers telling his dad to drop him off a block from school. His Dad calmly drove him not only all the way to school, but up onto the front lawn! My friend never asked to be dropped off out of sight again.

My granddaughter thinks frogs are the creepiest things on the planet, so the year she became a teen I ordered 60 tiny green frog figurines (cute ones, not realistic ones) and her mom and I had a blast hiding them all over her room. Of course, she eye-rolled us, but she’ll always remember her 13th birthday.

Whenever my kids whined and begged in the store for something they HAD to have, I’d say, “I think you’re old enough to know now, see that lady in the cereal aisle? She’s your real mom, I’ve just been babysitting. Go ask her for what you want.” They’d moan, “Moooom!” but it stopped the begging with humor instead of crankiness.

Of course, no matter what, there will be tough days. If my kids got to the point of yelling, “You’re the worst mom in the world!” instead of crying and moping, I would grab a wooden spoon from the drawer, wave it in the air and launch into a long acceptance speech: “I’d like to thank the academy for this high honor, I have worked hard to be the worst mom in the world, …” It diffused the negativity in my heart while they stomped off to their rooms.

Last Christmas, my granddaughter HAD to have Nike socks. Apparently, they are part of the new teen “uniform”, and all other socks are dumb. If you don’t know, Nike socks are crazy expensive. I bought a bag of reasonably priced white socks instead, grabbed my black embroidery thread and sewed “Nike” on all the socks. She glared at me when she opened them, but she wears them and laughs with her friends about her weird Nana.

PC: Ann Kirsten

My Piece de la Resistance though was when my oldest was a teen.

I worked in a huge grocery store and Kirsten’s health class was coming in for a tour. You’d think the queen was coming for all the instructions Kirsten gave me beforehand: “Do not embarrass me” “Don’t do anything weird” “In fact, don’t even talk to me, pretend you don’t know me.”

I listened in wide-eyed innocence while she blathered on, all the while planning my revenge.

When I arrived at work, I went around to all the other department managers and asked them for their help. When Freya’s class arrived, the fun began. One by one, each department did a microphone ad using Kirsten’s name.

“We have apples on sale back in produce, Kirsten says an apple a day keeps the doctor away!”

“Our summer Barbie dolls are in; Kirsten especially loves the one with the pink dress!”

There were pizzas for Kirsten in the deli, fish health tips from Kirsten in the seafood department, and Kirsten’s favorite steaks in the meat department. The ads went on and on and the creativity was astounding (especially from those with teens of their own).

A very mad teenager came stomping back to my department with her hands on her hips. I looked up and said, “What?” She sputtered and pointed her finger at me. I said, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” and continued working. Lesson: Don’t think you’re smarter than mom.

So, you see, the establishment of appropriate power and authority does not have to be a heavy negative experience that leaves everyone angry and exhausted. Humor can get your point across without the raised voices and hurt feelings (besides it’s WAY more fun).

One of the saddest stories I ever heard was told by the famed humor writer, Erma Bombeck. Erma wrote funny books about motherhood before blogs were ever heard of. She shared that she had received a letter from a lady in prison who had read one of her books. In it, she said,

“If only I had known that I could laugh about such things”.

The constant stress of raising kids had pushed her to the edge and she had done the unthinkable. No one told her that motherhood didn’t have to be done perfectly and that it was okay to laugh.

I’m saying it now, It’s okay to laugh! The teen years can be tough for everyone. A little laughter goes a long way in navigating those years.

Do you have a funny teen story? Share it with us!