Put Your Oxygen Mask on First

Credit: iStock | swissmediavision

If you pay attention during the safety reminders the flight attendants give prior to take-off, you’ll always hear them say something like “secure your oxygen mask before helping others”. I am sure I had heard this many times but the one time it really stuck with me was years ago on the first flight I was on with my then six month old. I remember having the initial thought that no way would I ever do that; I would always first ensure my child had their oxygen on first.

But the reason for this safety guideline isn’t from a place of only worrying about saving yourself. It’s because if you don’t, you are more likely to not be able to help or save others. If you pass out in the middle of putting an oxygen mask on someone who cannot, then you haven’t helped anyone.

Think about this when it comes to motherhood. We may not have a literal oxygen mask but we have needs that need to be met; a cup that needs to be filled. Or at least needs to not be empty. If this remains empty for too long, we might feel like we quite literally are running out of air at times.

Moms often worry last about filling their own cups and first about everyone else. I have had moments in my almost 13 years of motherhood where I felt depleted, alone and unappreciated. More than just moments, I have had days that at some points have led into weeks of feeling this way.

When I was a newer mom, I perceived this as some sort of failure. Why was I feeling this way? Did feeling this way mean I wasn’t grateful for all that I had in life? I remember feeling confused and frustrated when this feeling would creep in.

The more seasoned I become as a mom, the wiser I truly become.

I now know when those feelings start to creep in; one thing is likely the case.

My cup is running on empty.

I have to remind myself this feeling is not related to failure or ungratefulness. It is because I am human. God created women in a unique and amazing way. But not in a way that makes us any less human than others. Super human, super mom, sure; at times. But human nonetheless.

Despite me feeling wiser as my years of motherhood go on, there are certainly times I am hit with a new challenge. Lately that often means something pre-teen related as this is all new territory for me as a mom. When those new challenges arise, I sometimes still forget that I too need oxygen just as much as everyone else.

If my cup starts running on empty, soon enough everyone will start feeling the impact.

As we settle into the new year, take the time to reflect and communicate to your spouse, partner, loved ones on what you need to feel full. That could mean a weekly church group with other moms so you have the space to talk, laugh and cry with others in your same stage of life. It could mean quiet time on a regular basis so you can focus on prayer or meditation. Perhaps it’s help around the house so you are not the only one who ever clears a dish. Maybe you need words of affirmation from your family so you know they really do appreciate all you do; do not be afraid to tell them what fills you up.

Do not be afraid to put on your oxygen mask first so you can be equipped to handle all that life has in store.

Do you have certain tactics to ensure your cup doesn’t become empty? Certain things that fill you up? We’d love to hear!