I used to be a full-time working mom.
Then I was a part-time working mom.
Then I was a stay-at-home mom.
Now I’m a work-from-home mom.
And I can tell you unequivocally: There is always mom guilt.
But I will also tell you something I’ve realized over the last few months: The guilt is different.
When I worked outside of the home, the guilt had a tinge of sadness. Sadness that I was missing moments. Sadness that I couldn’t be there all the time. Sadness that I was so exhausted in the evenings after a night of broken sleep, a ridiculously lengthy commute, and a day “on” at work. Sadness that I couldn’t be all the things to all the people and that I had so much on my plate that I had to let some things slide off.
{Mostly self-care. Naturally.}
But now that I’m home the guilt has a few different layers. Like anger. Frustration. Disappointment.
Anger that little things with my kids get under my skin. Frustration that I still can’t get everything done and ignore my kids in favor of productivity. Disappointment that even though I’m home with my kids, I’m still not the mom I thought I’d be.
Mama, no matter where you are don’t let the guilt lie to you. A simple change in your circumstances will not make it go away.
It may quell it momentarily, until it finds your area of weakness and rears its ugly head once again.
Just in another form.
Don’t let that longing lie to you that the cure to mom guilt is simple – because it’s not. The absolute truth is that you can do it well no matter where you are.
If you want to be home with your kids, be home with your kids. If you want to be at work, be at work. But make sure that the decision you’re making is based on more than just guilt – because guilt is a tricky, tricky beast and doesn’t tell you the truth.
As far as my life, today I’m living the dream I never realized I had. But that doesn’t mean it’s easy or comfortable or stress-free or guilt-free.
It just means the guilt I’ve chosen to live with is guilt I can handle.
So mama, be your best – wherever you are. Make your life decisions based on more than just guilt.
And love those babies, because that’s all that matters anyway.
Do you work or stay home? What’s your biggest source of mom guilt?
