When I was in high school, I helped organized a revolt against chicken nuggets. I was grossed out after having read an article about how the crispy chicken treats were made, including the use of diseased poultry that was used as a ‘binder’ for the meat. We made copies of the article, highlighting the especially disturbing parts and distributed them in the cafeteria. Just in case we overlooked anyone, we also hung a copy on every single locker. Brilliant marketing strategy, right? Our efforts resulted in the suspension of at least one of my co-conspirators, a hilarious walk down memory lane with my friends as we recounted our memories of the story, and a CHANGE IN THE SCHOOL MENU.
I really haven’t stopped since then.
Over the years my topics of choice may change, but when I learn something, I feel compelled to share. Not because I think people are stupid and need me to teach them, but because I love to learn and I assume others feel the same. When someone is excited about something new that they have discovered, it inspires me. I, in turn, want to share what has opened my eyes and changed the way I see things. I was raised to ask questions, to challenge the status quo, to prove my own truth, and to be willing to learn and grow.
Over the years I have been called outspoken, confident, loud, and passionate. To my knowledge, I have never been called Angry. Until recently, I had no idea that a Black woman who is outspoken, confident, loud, and passionate will often be labeled as Angry. This new knowledge has rocked my world for a number of reasons. Primarily, the unfairness of it. Why, as a white woman am I given space to voice my opinions where my Black sister isn’t? Secondly, the responsibility that comes with it. Not to mention, how in the world do I raise my incredible daughters to use their own passionate voices?
I am a white mother of 4 beautiful children. I have two boys and two girls. I have three white kids and one black one. I have one Black Daughter. I have one White Daughter. It wrecks me to think that their voices will be heard differently. It begs the question, when will the change happen? When will one go from Sassy to Passionate? When will one go from Sassy to Angry? And what can I do about it?
I have always been a passionate individual, but I’ve not always been wise in how or to whom I direct my passion. I am trying to do better. I am learning that sometimes I need to shut my mouth and listen to the passionate voices of those who have been mislabeled. Only then should I speak up and even then I should use my voice only in order to amplify theirs. I want to raise both my girls be able to ask questions, to challenge the status quo, to prove their own truths, and to learn and grow. I want to teach my daughters that their voices are important and not only deserve to be heard, but also need to be heard.
I will continue to use my confident, loud, passionate voice to speak up when I see unfairness in this world. I started practicing for this 20+ years ago and I will use the lessons I’ve learned along the way to try to make this world a better one for my children. I will use my passion to help pave the way for both of my beautiful daughters and my two amazing sons to be able speak their own mind and to be seen as nothing but the passionate, courageous, confident people they are.
Will you help me? If you are passionate like I am, would you consider channeling a little bit of that passion to help rewrite the narrative that outspoken Black women are Angry? If you’re not as loud, would you be willing to read some books written by Black women and consider their perspective; the voices of Latasha Morrison and Austin Channing Brown? Would you help me elevate the voices of Black women that we need to hear right now?
Would you help me create the world that I want to raise all of my children in?
Bottom line: a rectangle shaped nugget of chicken goo bound in diseased poultry is gross. Racism is reprehensible. I’ve matured to a place that I can agree to disagree on the merits of the former. I will never get to a place where I can agree to disagree on the latter. Let’s use our collective voices to insure that all of our individual, passionate voices can be heard equally, regardless of our skin color. I believe that if we join together, just like my rogue posse in high school, we can make a change.
Read more of Abbie Mabary’s contributions to AllMomDoes here.
